I don't have an update on any of my little friends, because I barely saw them this week.
Monday was a teacher inservice day, so no students at school. Tuesday Robby, my 4 yr old, became suddenly and severely ill with a "common childhood illness" that I had never heard of - and after 10+ years of teaching small children, I thought I knew them all. We spent 5 hours having tests down at the closest hospital Tuesday afternoon, only to be told "well, we've eliminated X and Y, so it must be Z!" HATE that, when the doctors don't really know what's wrong with my kid but won't admit it! Wednesday Robby seemed a bit better, so we headed back to school - big mistake, because Thursday morning he was twice as sick as before and I wound up missing Thursday and Friday to nurse him. The good news is, I'm sure he's finally on the mend and we will all be able to go back to school tomorrow!
Will, my 6 yr old, was initially quite ticked off that HE had to go to school while Robby got to stay home with Mom. Then I dangled the offer of riding the bus - something Will has wanted to do since preK, but never been allowed because there isn't anyone home when the bus hits our neighborhood! - in front of him and that suddenly made it much better. Isn't it funny what kids see as an awesome experience? I H-A-T-E-D riding the school bus every day, got picked on incessantly, and was often left without a seat because I was the last one on each morning and intensely unpopular. Will? Finds the whole bus thing fun beyond words, especially that he has a "bus buddy" and an assigned seat.
So today I get to go over and see just what a disaster is left after 2 days of emergency subs! I did, of course, run over Thursday night to scan the note that day's sub had left and put out things for the Friday sub, so I have some inkling of what I'm going to see. The problem is, the kids had Sub A when I had to leave in the middle of the day on Tuesday - the school nurse insisted Robby had to be examined by a doctor immediately! - Sub B on Thursday and Sub C on Friday, which is never a good thing!
I can only imagine how Van Gogh and Thing 1 melted down in the face of 3 different subs. As for my little girl who responds to any change or stress by making herself puke - frankly, I emailed her mother and told her I was going to be gone those 2 days, in the unspoken hope she would just keep Pukey home! The sub had enough to deal with between Toddler Girl, Van Gogh, and Thing 1, he/she didn't need to listen to gag-gag-hurl two or three times a day!
So that's been my week. I'm sure the kids will be glad to see me on Monday... at least until I tell them I'm going to be gone again in just a few days to take Will to a doctor's appointment!
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Double Trouble
One of this year's friends is half of a set of identical twins. I have Thing 1 and my coworker down the hall has Thing 2. Honestly, I sort of got lucky here, because Thing 1 is a whiny, tattle-tailing, immature, easily over stimulated bundle of irritation, but Thing 2 is aggressive, defiant, and incessantly loud. Yeah, if I have to have one of Double Trouble, I'll stick with Thing 1, thanks!
Thing 1 came to me via the special ed preschool program. Kindergarten is either his 3rd or 4th year in our school (I can't remember if he had 2 years with SPED or 1). I think it was 1 year of exclusively SPED, 1 year of 1/2 time SPED and 1/2 time regular PreK, and now me. Regardless, the point is, you would think by now Thing 1 would have some clue of how to behave at school. You would think WRONG, my friend, so wrong!
Let me digress for a moment to say, if you aren't actually that familiar with 5 and 6 year old children, they are some of the most black and white thinkers in the world. There are no shades of gray for the typical K kid. Which is what makes it so hard for them to accept others like Toddler Girl, who's entire life is pretty much gray scale. Thing 1 = the king of black and white!
So, needless to say, Toddler Girl drives Thing 1 batty! Thing 1 will not sit by, line up by, stand by, play by, be by Toddler Girl EVER. If he accidentally winds up within 4 feet of her he starts backing away, loudly saying "Oh NO! I am NOT by HER! I don't LIKE HER!" Thing 1 and I have had numerous conversations about Thumper's Rule (if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all) and about how he might need to think those things about Toddler Girl but he shouldn't let them come out of his mouth. Doesn't really help, because Thing 1 has this stream-of-consciousness verbal diarrhea going on most of the time. Truly, he likes to narrate his day, although I'm not sure if he does it for his own benefit or the rest of us. So, Toddler Girl and Thing 1, not a good combo.
Then we consider the dynamic of Thing 1 and Van Gogh. Thing 1 and Van Gogh were not in the same PreK class, although they know each other from the playground and some combined class activities. Thing 1 really enjoys the sound of Van Gogh's screams. Thing 1 will go out of his way to find ways to make Van Gogh scream and cry. Remember when I said Van Gogh lost his f'ing mind because someone kicked over his block tower, resulting in an earsplitting tantrum and the sudden appearance of Mrs. Pop? Yeah, that would be our buddy Thing 1! Thing 1 will argue with Van Gogh simply for the sake of arguing, so a conversation between them might be VG: I have a dragon toy! T1: No you don't! VG: Yes I do! T1: No you don't - until VG starts to bellow. So, Van Gogh and Thing 1, not a good combo.
Thing 1 loves to find reasons to tattle on others, tattles which are always told in this drawn out, high pitched whine that makes me want to shove sharp pencils through my ear drums. Toddler Girl is his favorite tattling subject and an easy target, although he's an equal opportunity tattler. He frequently advises me that I should make the subject of his tattles flip a card, although having to flip a card himself is a sure trip to Tantrum City. And honestly - Thing 1 flips a fair amount of cards, mostly because he cannot keep his hands, feet, and all other objects to himself!
On Thursday of this week Thing 1 took home an unhappy note from me. He'd had a rough week, with lots of cards flipped for hitting, kicking, pushing, and generally being physically aggressive. In his defense, he is 1 of 5 children in his 2 combined families, 1 of a set of twins, and has an older sibling with severe autism - I think being physically aggressive might be a defense mechanism at home! That aside, he has got to cut it out at school. So I sent home a note. As it happened, the day I wrote the note had been a rough day across the board in our classroom and I had invited Mrs. Pop in to talk to my class at the end of the day about not hitting, kicking, pinching, etc. As she was talking Thing 1 pulled a toy car out of his backpack and began to play with it, rather loudly. I shook my head and frowned at him, he smiled sweetly and ran his car along the arm of the girl next to him. I reached down and took the car - Thing 1 began to scream. "I want my car!" he wailed. Mrs. Pop stopped, frowned, and said sternly "Thing 1! I am TALKING! You need to be quiet and listen!" "I want my car!" "Thing 1! QUIET!" "I WANT MY CAR!!!" At that point Mrs. Pop (gently) stood him up and removed him from my room. We could hear his screams echoing down the hall as she marched him to her office. I was now faced with the unpleasant task of telling whichever of his adults was picking him up that day that he was in the Principal's office and he/she would need to go retrieve him. As it happened, both mom and step-mom were there (they have an amazingly cordial relationship) and both sighed in unison and apologized.
The next day Thing 1 handed me a note back from his mother. She apologized again, assured me that all 4 of his parents had talked to him about it, and asked if I had any suggestions to help control his behavior. What? Parental support? No excuses? Blow my mind why don't you? Anyway, I promptly wrote back and told her that Thing 1 had just had an especially hard week, I still thought he was a sweet and wonderful kid (which he is, under the whining and all) and that my suggestion was that, for now, I would send home a behavior note each day. It's a little form I have that lists all the card colors, has boxes to write in why cards were flipped, and a place to indicate whether the child received a warning first, whether he/she went to the safe seat, to the time out room, or to the office. Thing 1 and I talked about it as well (he told me repeatedly he didn't WANT a behavior note, like that was going to stop me!) and I popped the first of what I am sure will be many in his folder.
Thing 1 does have some redeeming qualities, ones that keep me from shutting him in the closet "by accident" each morning. He's an extremely loving child, with lots of hugs to share and he loves to hold hands with almost anyone (Toddler Girl and Van Gogh aside). He tries really hard to do his work and doesn't give up easily, no whining that it's too hard or he doesn't want to do it. He's cute as a button - huge dark blue eyes in a freckled face topped by dark brown hair. He loves to be read to and wants to snuggle down with me and a book whenever we have a free moment. And he really, really, really wants to be good and is sorry when he is in trouble. Not sorry enough not to do it again, but truly sorry and sad that I am upset with him. He's not all bad, by a long shot, and I have a soft spot for him. I just don't want him to know that!
In other news, Toddler Girl's SPED testing is supposed to be completed this week ('bout freaking time! Drag your feet much there SPED?) and I'm rubbing my hands in glee at the thought of having a break from her during the day. My chat with the class about helping her and being kind has helped somewhat, in that the tattles have decreased and a couple of the girls are mother-henning her as I had hoped. She still takes up a disproportionate amount of my time each day, but we are doing the best we can.
Van Gogh had a rough week as well (think it was something in the air?) and did not manage to keep his card green 1 day all week. Which was very upsetting to him, because he only needs one more punch on his good behavior ticket to get into the treasure box. Darn that mean ol' Mrs. Kindergarten and her stupid rules about not hitting/kicking/screaming in people's faces!
And Princess? Not much to report there. Queen Mum somehow found my school email address (I'm just glad it wasn't the home one!) and now emails me on a near daily basis with questions, concerns, comments, etc. Ah well, emails are easy than phone calls, right?
So that's it for this week's update. I'm not quite sure which friend I want to write about next week. I'll have to watch for any interesting stories to crop up!
Thing 1 came to me via the special ed preschool program. Kindergarten is either his 3rd or 4th year in our school (I can't remember if he had 2 years with SPED or 1). I think it was 1 year of exclusively SPED, 1 year of 1/2 time SPED and 1/2 time regular PreK, and now me. Regardless, the point is, you would think by now Thing 1 would have some clue of how to behave at school. You would think WRONG, my friend, so wrong!
Let me digress for a moment to say, if you aren't actually that familiar with 5 and 6 year old children, they are some of the most black and white thinkers in the world. There are no shades of gray for the typical K kid. Which is what makes it so hard for them to accept others like Toddler Girl, who's entire life is pretty much gray scale. Thing 1 = the king of black and white!
So, needless to say, Toddler Girl drives Thing 1 batty! Thing 1 will not sit by, line up by, stand by, play by, be by Toddler Girl EVER. If he accidentally winds up within 4 feet of her he starts backing away, loudly saying "Oh NO! I am NOT by HER! I don't LIKE HER!" Thing 1 and I have had numerous conversations about Thumper's Rule (if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all) and about how he might need to think those things about Toddler Girl but he shouldn't let them come out of his mouth. Doesn't really help, because Thing 1 has this stream-of-consciousness verbal diarrhea going on most of the time. Truly, he likes to narrate his day, although I'm not sure if he does it for his own benefit or the rest of us. So, Toddler Girl and Thing 1, not a good combo.
Then we consider the dynamic of Thing 1 and Van Gogh. Thing 1 and Van Gogh were not in the same PreK class, although they know each other from the playground and some combined class activities. Thing 1 really enjoys the sound of Van Gogh's screams. Thing 1 will go out of his way to find ways to make Van Gogh scream and cry. Remember when I said Van Gogh lost his f'ing mind because someone kicked over his block tower, resulting in an earsplitting tantrum and the sudden appearance of Mrs. Pop? Yeah, that would be our buddy Thing 1! Thing 1 will argue with Van Gogh simply for the sake of arguing, so a conversation between them might be VG: I have a dragon toy! T1: No you don't! VG: Yes I do! T1: No you don't - until VG starts to bellow. So, Van Gogh and Thing 1, not a good combo.
Thing 1 loves to find reasons to tattle on others, tattles which are always told in this drawn out, high pitched whine that makes me want to shove sharp pencils through my ear drums. Toddler Girl is his favorite tattling subject and an easy target, although he's an equal opportunity tattler. He frequently advises me that I should make the subject of his tattles flip a card, although having to flip a card himself is a sure trip to Tantrum City. And honestly - Thing 1 flips a fair amount of cards, mostly because he cannot keep his hands, feet, and all other objects to himself!
On Thursday of this week Thing 1 took home an unhappy note from me. He'd had a rough week, with lots of cards flipped for hitting, kicking, pushing, and generally being physically aggressive. In his defense, he is 1 of 5 children in his 2 combined families, 1 of a set of twins, and has an older sibling with severe autism - I think being physically aggressive might be a defense mechanism at home! That aside, he has got to cut it out at school. So I sent home a note. As it happened, the day I wrote the note had been a rough day across the board in our classroom and I had invited Mrs. Pop in to talk to my class at the end of the day about not hitting, kicking, pinching, etc. As she was talking Thing 1 pulled a toy car out of his backpack and began to play with it, rather loudly. I shook my head and frowned at him, he smiled sweetly and ran his car along the arm of the girl next to him. I reached down and took the car - Thing 1 began to scream. "I want my car!" he wailed. Mrs. Pop stopped, frowned, and said sternly "Thing 1! I am TALKING! You need to be quiet and listen!" "I want my car!" "Thing 1! QUIET!" "I WANT MY CAR!!!" At that point Mrs. Pop (gently) stood him up and removed him from my room. We could hear his screams echoing down the hall as she marched him to her office. I was now faced with the unpleasant task of telling whichever of his adults was picking him up that day that he was in the Principal's office and he/she would need to go retrieve him. As it happened, both mom and step-mom were there (they have an amazingly cordial relationship) and both sighed in unison and apologized.
The next day Thing 1 handed me a note back from his mother. She apologized again, assured me that all 4 of his parents had talked to him about it, and asked if I had any suggestions to help control his behavior. What? Parental support? No excuses? Blow my mind why don't you? Anyway, I promptly wrote back and told her that Thing 1 had just had an especially hard week, I still thought he was a sweet and wonderful kid (which he is, under the whining and all) and that my suggestion was that, for now, I would send home a behavior note each day. It's a little form I have that lists all the card colors, has boxes to write in why cards were flipped, and a place to indicate whether the child received a warning first, whether he/she went to the safe seat, to the time out room, or to the office. Thing 1 and I talked about it as well (he told me repeatedly he didn't WANT a behavior note, like that was going to stop me!) and I popped the first of what I am sure will be many in his folder.
Thing 1 does have some redeeming qualities, ones that keep me from shutting him in the closet "by accident" each morning. He's an extremely loving child, with lots of hugs to share and he loves to hold hands with almost anyone (Toddler Girl and Van Gogh aside). He tries really hard to do his work and doesn't give up easily, no whining that it's too hard or he doesn't want to do it. He's cute as a button - huge dark blue eyes in a freckled face topped by dark brown hair. He loves to be read to and wants to snuggle down with me and a book whenever we have a free moment. And he really, really, really wants to be good and is sorry when he is in trouble. Not sorry enough not to do it again, but truly sorry and sad that I am upset with him. He's not all bad, by a long shot, and I have a soft spot for him. I just don't want him to know that!
In other news, Toddler Girl's SPED testing is supposed to be completed this week ('bout freaking time! Drag your feet much there SPED?) and I'm rubbing my hands in glee at the thought of having a break from her during the day. My chat with the class about helping her and being kind has helped somewhat, in that the tattles have decreased and a couple of the girls are mother-henning her as I had hoped. She still takes up a disproportionate amount of my time each day, but we are doing the best we can.
Van Gogh had a rough week as well (think it was something in the air?) and did not manage to keep his card green 1 day all week. Which was very upsetting to him, because he only needs one more punch on his good behavior ticket to get into the treasure box. Darn that mean ol' Mrs. Kindergarten and her stupid rules about not hitting/kicking/screaming in people's faces!
And Princess? Not much to report there. Queen Mum somehow found my school email address (I'm just glad it wasn't the home one!) and now emails me on a near daily basis with questions, concerns, comments, etc. Ah well, emails are easy than phone calls, right?
So that's it for this week's update. I'm not quite sure which friend I want to write about next week. I'll have to watch for any interesting stories to crop up!
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Updates
Yick. I've spent the whole week coughing my lungs out, sneezing gobs of gunk, and running low grade fevers. Did I take a day or two off to recover? Hell no! I only get 8 sick days and 2 personal days per school year and I do not use them for myself!! I have Will and Robby to think about here and the many many illnesses they will contract over the course of a school year. What about those poor innocent kids in my class that I am probaby passing the illness to? Well, I figure I probably got it from one of them in the first place, so turn about is fair play!
Rather than introduce a new friend this week, I want to update on the ones previously introduced.
Princess - the whole lunch drama has me ready to pull out my hair! Queen Mum told me I was to check Princess' lunchbox each day - if she had a drink, then it was a "full lunch" from home. If there was no drink, then it was a "supplement" and she needed to take a tray as well. This worked for about 3 days, until Princess (mad that Mum was making her take a tray on a day she didn't want to) sneaked her own drink into the lunchbox and threw me completely off. Queen Mum called me that afternoon, raging that Princess had not taken a tray, and then completely mortified when we figured out what Princess had done. I finally made up 2 cards - one that says "Princess has a lunch from home today" with a picture of lunchbox on it and one that says "Princess needs a tray today" on it. Queen Mum puts the correct card in Princess' folder each morning, I check for it as soon as Princess gets to class, and there are no more questions or tears about what is happening at lunch that day. Still a PITA, but less so that having to inspect her lunchbox for a drink each day. The whole "supplement" has become an issue, as now other children want to bring snacks to take to lunch as well and it's officially against school policy. So I've been put in the very uncomfortable position of telling them "Well, Princess can, but you can't. Why? Um..... Because her Mum made a deal with Mrs. Pop. Sorry."
Van Gogh - I am almost out of patience with this little man. The incessant crying, shrieking, whining, yelling is enough to drive you batty. He only has 1 friend in class and is convinced he has sole proprietary rights to this child. If Friend tries to play with anyone else Van Gogh throws a monster tantrum and wails "You are never my friend again!!!!" Of course three minutes later he's by the boy's side, begging to play with him. The friend is remarkably tolerant of this, but I'm not sure how long that tolerance will last. Van Gogh threw a screaming fit at the end of recess Friday because "he didn't get long enough to play" - and no, he doesn't care that he got the same amount of time as everyone else - and I snapped at him "Are you hurt? No? Then KNOCK IT OFF!" To my utter surprise he turned off the tears and screaming immediately, like a light switch being flipped. Not a moment I'm proud of as a teacher, but apparently what works for him.
Toddler Girl - they finally completed her initial speech and language evaluation on Monday and she has the verbal skills of a 2.5 yr old. I did her baseline evaluation on Thursday and she can count to 3, knows 4 out of 10 colors, does not recognize any letters or numbers, and cannot find her name written on a page with 2 other words that start with the same letter. This is the same baseline evaluation I do with all the K kids in September, not something special I did just for her. The good news is, she is finally able to sit somewhat quietly on the carpet with us during whole group activities, and is doing markedly less hitting than 2 weeks ago. On Friday I had the guidance counselor take her out of the room for half an hour to play some games while we had a class meeting. Without using her name - although the children knew who I was talking about - I led a discussion about how one of our friends was having a hard time learning how to act at school, in part because she had never been to preschool, daycare, or Head Start, and how we all needed to help her learn to follow the rules. We talked about how sad it makes me to see people say and do mean things to her and how much she wants to play with them, she just doesn't know how to do it. We also talked about how it isn't really helpful to me for them to tell on her every time she lays down on the carpet, sits up on her rest mat, or walks beside the line instead of in the line. I can see and hear her just as well as they can and don't really need 15 little reporters telling me every time.I hopefully sparked some mother-hen feelings in a few of my little girls - for the first time I saw them trying to include her in their games at recess. Toddler Girl was THRILLED when they invited her to swing with them. I'll do the best I can to keep stirring up support for her, although she undermines me when she does things like lean over and snap her teeth at the girl swinging next to her!
Next weekend I'll introduce my buddy Double Trouble, arch enemy of Toddler Girl!
Rather than introduce a new friend this week, I want to update on the ones previously introduced.
Princess - the whole lunch drama has me ready to pull out my hair! Queen Mum told me I was to check Princess' lunchbox each day - if she had a drink, then it was a "full lunch" from home. If there was no drink, then it was a "supplement" and she needed to take a tray as well. This worked for about 3 days, until Princess (mad that Mum was making her take a tray on a day she didn't want to) sneaked her own drink into the lunchbox and threw me completely off. Queen Mum called me that afternoon, raging that Princess had not taken a tray, and then completely mortified when we figured out what Princess had done. I finally made up 2 cards - one that says "Princess has a lunch from home today" with a picture of lunchbox on it and one that says "Princess needs a tray today" on it. Queen Mum puts the correct card in Princess' folder each morning, I check for it as soon as Princess gets to class, and there are no more questions or tears about what is happening at lunch that day. Still a PITA, but less so that having to inspect her lunchbox for a drink each day. The whole "supplement" has become an issue, as now other children want to bring snacks to take to lunch as well and it's officially against school policy. So I've been put in the very uncomfortable position of telling them "Well, Princess can, but you can't. Why? Um..... Because her Mum made a deal with Mrs. Pop. Sorry."
Van Gogh - I am almost out of patience with this little man. The incessant crying, shrieking, whining, yelling is enough to drive you batty. He only has 1 friend in class and is convinced he has sole proprietary rights to this child. If Friend tries to play with anyone else Van Gogh throws a monster tantrum and wails "You are never my friend again!!!!" Of course three minutes later he's by the boy's side, begging to play with him. The friend is remarkably tolerant of this, but I'm not sure how long that tolerance will last. Van Gogh threw a screaming fit at the end of recess Friday because "he didn't get long enough to play" - and no, he doesn't care that he got the same amount of time as everyone else - and I snapped at him "Are you hurt? No? Then KNOCK IT OFF!" To my utter surprise he turned off the tears and screaming immediately, like a light switch being flipped. Not a moment I'm proud of as a teacher, but apparently what works for him.
Toddler Girl - they finally completed her initial speech and language evaluation on Monday and she has the verbal skills of a 2.5 yr old. I did her baseline evaluation on Thursday and she can count to 3, knows 4 out of 10 colors, does not recognize any letters or numbers, and cannot find her name written on a page with 2 other words that start with the same letter. This is the same baseline evaluation I do with all the K kids in September, not something special I did just for her. The good news is, she is finally able to sit somewhat quietly on the carpet with us during whole group activities, and is doing markedly less hitting than 2 weeks ago. On Friday I had the guidance counselor take her out of the room for half an hour to play some games while we had a class meeting. Without using her name - although the children knew who I was talking about - I led a discussion about how one of our friends was having a hard time learning how to act at school, in part because she had never been to preschool, daycare, or Head Start, and how we all needed to help her learn to follow the rules. We talked about how sad it makes me to see people say and do mean things to her and how much she wants to play with them, she just doesn't know how to do it. We also talked about how it isn't really helpful to me for them to tell on her every time she lays down on the carpet, sits up on her rest mat, or walks beside the line instead of in the line. I can see and hear her just as well as they can and don't really need 15 little reporters telling me every time.I hopefully sparked some mother-hen feelings in a few of my little girls - for the first time I saw them trying to include her in their games at recess. Toddler Girl was THRILLED when they invited her to swing with them. I'll do the best I can to keep stirring up support for her, although she undermines me when she does things like lean over and snap her teeth at the girl swinging next to her!
Next weekend I'll introduce my buddy Double Trouble, arch enemy of Toddler Girl!
Sunday, September 7, 2008
weekend update postponed
Ugh, my goal was to write at least one post a week, probably on the weekends. However this weekend I am sick as a dog (what does that expression mean, anyway?) with a racking cough, fever hovering around 101, and sinus pressure that makes my head feel 1,000 lbs heavy and like it is being squeezed in a vise. So, hang tight, and I'll post when I feel somewhat human again.
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